SHOULD GIVING FEEL GOOD OR SHOULD IT HURT?
In some of
the workshops I’ve been facilitating, we’ve talked about generosity; and one of
the examples I’ve used is about an older woman that I remember from when I was
younger, and how, while I knew she wasn’t well off, she was committed to
regular weekly giving, and giving over and above when a need arose. I had
always been impressed, suspecting that when she was giving to God’s work
through that church, she was probably giving up something for herself at the
same time.
When I’ve
told that story, and when I’ve worked on a money autobiography, I’ve found that
the person or persons who I identified as the most generous weren’t those who
drove the best cars or put the most money in the offering plate, but was
instead this woman whose gifts, in dollars, was small compared with other
larger gifts, in dollars.
I’ve viewed
this story as a positive one, showing how a person is generous out of what they
have, “abundant” or not. But then I encountered an article published through
the Lilly Family School of Philanthropy, written by Rev. Xavier L. Johnson,
titled The Problem with Giving ‘Til It Hurts. His viewpoint of the story
of The Widow’s Mite in the gospel of Mark (which I equate with the story I tell
of the woman in my church, was that it implies that if people, particularly poor
people, give until it hurts, they’ll earn a gold star from God. The author
talks about the context of the story originally, being set during a time when
the Roman’s oppressive rulership of the day left many Jews destitute.
I don’t
think that inviting people to give implies pain. I believe that inviting people
to give is inviting them to be generous. Some gifts may require a sacrifice,
certainly, but it shouldn’t be painful. Generosity needs to be more than a
practice, but must be foundational and part of our lifestyle. Asking people to
give and be generous is only part of the picture. If we’re one of those persons
doing “the ask”, then we also have to bear responsibility for using those gifts
in the way Jesus would ask us to; and be transparent and not manipulative. It’s a two-sided covenant, just as our
covenant with God is two-sided. If we’re asking for gifts, then we have to be responsible
in the way we utilize those gifts and how we ask.
In other
words, giving should feel good and joyous. And that joy translates to the use
of those gifts for God’s work in the world.
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